My name is Tanya and I have a bucketload of shame. I have many models, shelves full of them, but almost nothing is painted. I know, I’m a monster. As someone who doesn’t play tournaments and barely gets to play due to living in a relatively isolated community, painting has always taken a backseat to my other nerdy endeavours. I’m also a very relaxed gamer; I love to play but I do not care if my opponent needs to proxy some stuff, or his/her models also aren’t painted, and certainly I don’t care if marines are in mix and match power armour. Seriously, let’s just play! I’m a busy woman: I am training to play my first roller derby game, I am a full time pawn broker, and I have other hobbies too(like RPG night once a week, and squeezing video and board games in every once in awhile). That being said, I want to work on painting more in 2016.

Currently I have five thousand-ish points of Chaos Space Marines, two thousand points of Space Wolves, and a thousand points of Lizardmen. I’m not going to lie to you, about eighty percent of it isn’t painted. I’m hanging my head in shame and avoiding eye-contact. My poor models are sitting patiently awaiting their chance at painted glory. Unfortunately for them, they are going to have to wait longer. Games Workshop just released the Horus Heresy: Betrayal at Calth box set last month and I’m all over that like white on rice on a paper plate in a snowstorm.

My husband spoils me, and my birthday last month was no different. He got me not one, but two Calth box sets. He knows I have wanted to start a 30k Salamanders Army for as long as I have been playing 40k. What has always stopped me from going forward with the plans for it was the enormous cost associated with it. Price is a huge obstacle when buying Forge World products as a person who lives outside of the United Kingdom: you basically have to tack on an additional thirty percent to account for shipping and duty. The boxset allows me to take the need to buy basic troops out of the equation entirely, and will leave me with more money in the future to buy special goodies. Basically this box set is making my army economically viable.

I hate assembly; it’s just not my thing. It’s therefore really important to me that models be easily and intuitively put together. I was a little worried at first when I heard there would be push fit models, because my experience with the Dark Vengeance boxset was a little shaky. All that trepidation has melted away now that I put the models together and I’m extremely satisfied with the quality of the box set. The captain and chaplain/dark apostle models are lovely: no weird gaps or ambiguous melted-looking crap casts, and the the seams are in places where you can barely see them. The only real negative comment I can make about the Calth box is that the Contemptor Dreadnaughts are extremely static and not easily modded or repositioned. This is due to the fact that the entire model is only 6 pieces. It feels like the dreadnaught was an afterthought, which is unfortunate because it could have been the centerpiece of the entire set.

I did make a few changes to the build GW suggested to play the boardgame. I did this to keep my Salamanders a bit fluffier and more flavourful. I’m not usually one to read the novels, but I do like to peek through the Lexicanum and read paraphrased lore. I love that the Salamanders are benevolent and yet still badass. I also love hot, flamey death at close quarters so really, they are a perfect fit for me. I have three basic ten man Legion Tactical Squads with 7 bolters, 2 flamers and a sergeant with combi-flamer/powerfist each. I also made one ten man legion heavy support squad with heavy bolters. I raided those extra pieces from the bits left over from my husband’s Calth boxset. Both of my 5 man Terminator squads are kitted out with a heavy flamer/lightning claw, chainfist/storm bolter, and the other three have twin lightning claws. I decided to make two ten man Legion Tactical Support squads. The purist, fluff tight asses would probably be upset to know that I used 40k flamers on some of them but behold the field where I grow my fucks and see that it is barren. Seriously, if you are that person harping about how some of the unit is in mark IV power armour and the rest is not, or that bolter is not period correct, etc. just stop. At the end of the day, it’s just a game, so be happy that you have someone to play with. I digress. I kitted out my dreadnaughts in one each of the two options that come in the box, one multi-melta and one assault cannon. It’s nice to have options.

I plan to paint all this stuff over the course of the entirety of 2016. It is a pretty long period of time, but I really cannot explain just how slow of a painter I really am. Also, perfectionism is a bitch of a mistress; I recommend staying away from her. Expect some updates as I go along, and you can check out my work in progress on instagram @tannibal_lecter.