Solid paint job is solid

One of the more pleasing side effects that has developed with the birth of this website has been the reaction from lapsed gamers amongst the punk community. Fond memories of simpler times are stirred, the embers of youthful enthusiasms are rekindled and folk start to realise that for a lot of hardcore kids all this Warhammer and fantasy stuff provides something of a common bond. With enlightenment often comes the bubbling spring of renewed interest, which then inevitably grinds to a screeching halt when they have a look at how much it all fucking costs.

‘I wanna get back into it but it’s sooooo expensive these days’. Sometimes it feels like GW continues to hike up the price of their product with a clear focus on Mummy & Daddys wallet rather than maintaining patronage of the likes of us or encouraging back those who’ve now grown up, have jobs and a little money to spend.. ‘The stores ain’t what they used to be’, ‘the pressure sales gets on my tits’, ‘White Dwarf sucks now blah blah blah’…it’s Like Ben Cook says ‘everybody knows, everybody see’s, everybody talks but no ones saying nothin’.

Jord : ‘But dude you failed your armour save…’
Ben: ‘DOESNT MATTER TO ME I ALREADY WON!!!’

So what advice can I give the born again gamer, the errant lamb returning to the flock? Well, far be it from me to encourage any kind of petty theft or shoplifting, that would be well out of order, instead I advise them to look elsewhere for models that suit their taste and wallet as many of us have had to do. Fortunately there’s a ton of smaller companies out there ‘kinda’ doing the same stuff as GW. Fan run independents who recognise the need for competitive prices and the vacancy for different options. Given the outcome of the recent Chapterhouse vs GW legal battle, I think it’s fair to say that a lot more cottage industry design houses are gonna be cropping up which I personally think is great news. I’ve got another article on ice waiting to go up which introduces a lot of these alternatives to GW to the noob so look out for that in a bit.

‘But I only like GW models’. I hear that a lot too and I feel you. That’s all fair enough mate, we empathise, we don’t judge.

Your best option then, is to scour the auction sites on the web for old models. Now I know that probably seems pretty obvious and buying up loose figures doesn’t hold quite the same magic as tearing open a fresh blister, plus it can still be a pricey endeavor for the classic models you are inevitably looking for. This is why you buy up ‘pre-painted models’. Now don’t confuse that with ‘Pro painted’ models because that WILL cost you some paper. No, I’m talking about the models that have been desecrated by some sausage fingered chump-child armed with a couple of tins of Humbrol (no primer). Probably pestered his/her mam to spend money on them when the other kids at school got into the WH buzz then lost interest and slung’em in the loft when Pogs or whatever the fuck came through. You know the type of kids I mean, we have them in hardcore too.

I’ve picked up a ton of stuff for my Dark Elves, Space Wolves and Skaven off of eBay. For absolute buttons. A lot of people just look at pre-painted models as being an inconvenience, the thought of having to deal with all that years old, thickly caked on paint. Total drag right? Well as I’m about to illustrate, that’s not the case at all.

You will need:
Fairy Power Spray (couple of quid from Wilkinsons)
Old Toothbrush
Pre-abused miniature
Tupperware container with sealable lid

Give your bottle of powerspray a good old shake. It can get really gloopy towards the bottom of the bottle so be sure to invigorate it. I’m sure you’ll have no problem there.

Unscrew the sprayer and pour enough of the fluid into the bowl to completely cover the amount of figures you are cleaning. Now, try not to get it on your hands because this is harsh stuff. It throws out some heavy fumes too so don’t inhale it either. I took in a lungful on my first outing with this stuff and I’m still not sure if I accidentally broke edge or not.

Duh

Take your figures, drop’em in the sauce, ensuring all painted parts are covered and seal the container.

Put the box in the shed or out of reach, somewhere well ventilated. NOT in your bedroom.

Go have a brew.

Now obviously you have to judge how long to leave the models to soak.. I’ve slung a couple of old metal Necromunda gangers in my pot for demonstrative purposes. They were painted over twenty years ago so I’ll be leaving them in overnight. There’s also a couple of plastic space marines that I made a total fist of three years ago, they will probably require less of time in the bath because I was using less paint on my brush, better quality paints etc etc. Obviously the longer you leave it the easier the paint is to take off. You’ll have to figure this out for yourselves depending on what you’ve got in the soup, use some fucking initiative.

Colemans, pasty, brew. Sorted

Fish out your models and get to work giving them a good old scrub with the toothbrush.
With very minimal effort you’ll soon discover that the old paint sloughs off metal models like dead skin off a scabby foot. Be aware that the spray also degrades any adhesives you or the previous owners may have used so multipart models (particularly plastic ones) will likely have fallen apart in the mix. Also be mindful of that when you are dumping out the waste so you don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater so to speak. Once you are satisfied, give’em a rinse off under the tap and leave’em to dry. Done.

Give him a little scrub…

So there you have it, piece of piss. Saved yourself a few bob and it’s satisfying to see old models shine once again.

Be sure to dispose of power spray responsibly, you won’t be able to reuse it. Careful where you sling it too. That stuffs toxic so dilute it and put it down an exterior drain, we don’t want domestic pets or wildlife getting a taste. Got to watch out for the little guys.

I realise that this little exercise will no doubt come off as teaching Grandma to suck eggs for the more experienced gamers amongst you and thats fine. See you need to understand that the point of this blog is to reach out to people, share some easy tips and help folk find their feet, maybe encourage a little bit of community. When you see some young green kid, scared out of their wits at their first HC show fall down in the pit, you don’t spit on their face and look the other way while they get trampled on do you? No mate, you reach out your hand and you get’em back on their feet. We’re just trying to do the same.
Corehammer for Corehammer…what the fuck else?

As good as new!!